it's so scary
driving for the first time
alone, in my own car
it started off the same way
i drove my moms kia or the rental
laughing to myself
short and hard low laughs
a laugh of joy and disbelief
the same sound of the laugh that comes out
in frustration
in not getting simple things
like my times tables, and later
monogamous love
then i have my hands on the steering wheel
first at 10 and 2
then one and 12
then 5 and seven
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