no rest for the wicked

late night experiments
make work hard
and naps easy

seafoam green discs
slip from under my skin
and into my room shimmering,spinning
flickering like an old projector

i wrapped myself in matts warm down
and you talked about detox,massages,lesbians,court dates
your voice fast, strong, needing something
the cartoon lines blown out and blurry

rolling my eyes to the sky
i set my alarm to four hours from now
anticipate a difficult and glorious shower
and drink down my tap

you will later take me
to draw circles of sleep
around tired eyelids

shayna it will get better i promise

i woke up and there was an avalanche in my bed
resumes, pamphlets on resumes
calls, not returned
but the biggest boulder of all
trickled out of the radio
and broke my solar plexus
broken but shining
like a tiny gem refracting life for eternity
your voice came through
raspy, tired, but ever languid
liquid, beautiful even with chemo
you ask yourself, Henry
what is going to make you feel best?
i gather up the pieces of my chest
and, hiding behind steam
jam them back in place
hot streams loosening the void
gasps and cries resonating off white tiles
refracting, amplifying into the dark waters of forever